Walking Back To Wholeness
Femi Olasupo
February 3, 2025
Are you aware of how you are investing your attention? Where is your focus most of the time? Are your thoughts mostly on what you intend to create or on things outside your control?
When we focus on what’s outside our control we are most likely focusing on lack. Thoughts of lack inform your choices, your behaviors, your experiences, and your emotional states.
Additionally, when we find ourselves focusing on lack, we are most often focused on GETTING instead of BEING, because we’ve convinced ourselves that we are missing something. And, when we focus on what’s missing and what is or could go wrong, we neglect all the wonderful things we already have and all the wonderful possibilities of what can go right.
The root of our unhappiness is placing our attention on what's wrong, what’s missing, and what’s flawed.
Our mission is to return to a state of wholeness.
We can choose to change. We can practice awareness of our thoughts. We can decide how long we allow our thoughts to be rooted in lack instead of wholeness.
When we’re focused on lack we convince ourselves that something is missing, that life as it is should not be this way, and we go on a quest to feel the void with externals, like a different job, new romantic partner, new clothes, a new car, rearranging our home or whatever other externalized attempt.
We think to ourselves, if I don’t have [insert what’s missing] I can’t be happy.
OR
I won’t be happy until I have [insert what’s missing].
This is a choice.
If we don’t practice changing, choosing, and reinforcing the kinds of thoughts we truly want, we will feel stuck in a mood and experience we don’t like.
When we choose to focus our attention on wholeness we acknowledge that it comes from within. Wholeness comes from within the circle of things we can control.
In a state of wholeness, your focus shifts to yourself and the areas within your control. You embrace responsibility for your life and circumstances, recognizing yourself as a powerful creator who actively shapes your experiences rather than simply experiencing what life brings.
Your thoughts, choices, and behaviors are rooted in BEING in alignment with all the things you desire. You no longer care to give your energy to complaining, replaying unfair events of the past, and blaming others.
You aren’t as self-conscious anymore because you are no longer trying to get something out there. You are focused on summoning the emotional states within that are tied to the experiences you seek and aligning yourself to draw what you desire to you.
In wholeness, you can attain a sense of detachment and contentment, feeling at peace with the present moment. You approach your desires with joy, working towards them not from desperation or lack, but from a place of inner wholeness. With a full heart, you embrace any outcome, trusting with infinite patience and faith that what you seek is on its way to you.
Reflection in Action: 3 Ways To Walk Toward Wholeness
Focus On What's Going Right by Counting Your Wins:
Dedicate a few minutes each day and list at least three positive things that happened, no matter how small. This could include starting a new habit, receiving a compliment, or prioritizing your needs in some way. By actively acknowledging your wins, you shift your focus toward what’s going right and naturally attract more of it. Use the lift in the image below. Each day consider counting 3 inside wins (wins directly related to your actions) and 3 outside wins (wins that happen outside your direct actions):
Create the Experiences You Want Inside Your Mind Through Visualization:
Set aside time each day for visualization. Find a quiet space, close your eyes, and envision in detail the experiences, goals, or feelings you desire. Imagine what achieving your dreams looks and feels like, engaging all your senses. Aim to make it so real in your mind that you are already experiencing it. This practice can reinforce your belief in the possibility of those experiences and motivate you to take aligned actions.Practice Self-Compassion:
Sometimes our inner world is so foggy due to too many conflicting voices. The best way to combat this is to spend time with yourself as if you were your own best friend. This develops a clear and supportive inner voice. Practicing self-compassion turns down the volume on your inner critic and increases the volume of a kinder voice inside your head. Download the free self-compassion journal here and use it to make your headspace a happy place.
By implementing these practical steps, you can actively walk toward a more fulfilling state of wholeness, enriching your life with openness, self-awareness, and compassion. Each small action contributes to the larger journey of embracing your life fully, fostering a sense of empowerment and contentment.